It was Christmas and you were hosting a party in your house. For the party, you decided to invite two of your best friends over. Your two friends are a Chinese (Ah Ming) from China who is a Buddhist and a Malay (Aisha) from Malaysia who is a Muslim respectively. As to promote the spirit of giving during Christmas, your friends were informed to bring presents to exchange with others.
For the exchanging of presents, Aisha got Ah Ming a clock as Ah Ming was always late for lessons. She bought the clock as a gift since she thought it would make a practical gift for Ah Ming and it could assist him in arriving on time for lessons. However, Aisha did not know that, for the Chinese, it is inappropriate to use clocks as a gift, as the pronunciation of “giving clock” in mandarin sounds as though "to send a person off for his last journey", or simply, to wish him dead.
Meanwhile, Ah Ming got Aisha a pencil case that resembled a plush pig because he noticed her old pencil case was old and worn-out. Since Aisha was born in the year of pig, which is one of the Chinese zodiac characters, Ah Ming bought that pencil case intending to make the present more significant to her. However, Ah Ming did not realize that Malays, whose religion is Islam, consider pigs as dirty and unholy animals that must be avoided.
During the Christmas day party, both of them exchanged those inappropriate gifts ignorantly. As a result, Aisha and Ah Ming were not on talking terms for the following week.
What should you do?
Hi Jonathon
ReplyDeleteIt was interesting to read this post. It highlights the importance of understanding intercultural differences and acting accordingly. Otherwise unnecessary problems may arise between friends from different cultures.
In this case, the friends can clear the misunderstanding between them by talking it out face-to-face. Aisha can explain to Ah Ming that she did not mean to convey a negative meaning through the clock she presented her. In addition, she can also let her know the real reason for giving the clock. In return, Ah Ming can also clear the misunderstanding between them by telling Aisha why she bought her a pencil case in the form of a plush pig. After hearing the practical reasons behind the gifts which happened to unintentionally turn out inappropriate, I am sure the friends understand the other’s situation and forgive each other. This would allow them to come back to talking terms with each other.
Regards
Iswarya
Hi Jonathan,
ReplyDeleteI think for this situation it would be best for them to have a face to face meeting to explain the reasons why each of them bought that specific present. In fact even before that, each party should recognise what is the source of their quarrel since sometimes the parties involved do not even know what issue they are quarrelling.
Since each of them started out with good intentions, I believe the other party will be more tolerant to this insensitivity and forgive each other for their lack of knowledge. Perhaps after this they could try to share more of their cultural beliefs in the future to minimise these types of misunderstandings.
regards
Zhi Hong
Hi Jonathan,
ReplyDeleteYour post was interesting and it clearly showcased an example of how an inter personal conflict could rise up. I think that the best solution to solve this conflict would be for both of them to meet up face to face. Then they can tell each other why they actually got such gifts. They both did it unknowingly and so I feel that they will understand that they actually did not do it on purpose. And maybe by doing so, they will learn to know about each other’s culture well before proceeding in such kind of matters. :)
-Manjula